new found love for big bird

oh yeah anyway it's already past august and nous sommes on the way to DICIEMBRE. here's an update because some people keep quoting my 'why isn't it august yet fuck' so yes i have to update. had my first paper today and the second one will be tomorrow. and very soon it will be ALL OVER clap clap clap clap clap everybadeh clap clap. oh ya awhile ago i checked my phone's calendar and it said 'lemak' 7-8pm i kept wondering what it was. then i thought i put it down because it's the first day of my exams but why the hell lemak????? question mark times ten thousand. then i realised SUDDENLY oh yeah it's lenka.

thank you autocorrect you're always so funny.

so yes i'm going for lenka later but i have 40 bio mcqs tomorrow can my 'o' level c6 grade save me???? okay whatever you should always live like you're dying like lenka. or live like you were dying like tim mcgraw. or live like we're dying like kris allen.

TAKE EVERY MOMENT YOU KNOW THAT YOU OWN THEM IT'S ALL YOU CAN DO USE WHAT'S BEEN GIVEN TO YOU

not complaining though the bio mod's really interesting. AND WHY CAN'T ALL LECTURES BE LIKE THIS. look at those cute baby peas my my my.



i clicked on blogger at first to say that i could go on yawning forever but then i stopped. so here you go, a post about big bird. i miss my yawning queen. and i wanna sleep. this year i'm going to europe to hibernate. and i really hope sweden's as awesome as i thought. hej då.

:(((((((((((((

Maybe if I keep tiring myself out like that, I'd stop caring soon. Hopefully. Why isn't it August yet. Fuck. I don't want this in my life.

Thank you.

I'm actually a very passionate human being with a lot to say about important issues but my ambitions are tremendously hampered by my laziness.

I read, then I get angry...but then I go to sleep. I guess I'm choosing to escape instead of being overwhelmed by the negativities. I'd like to think that I have the ability to ignore these issues if I don't actively participate in the discussions or speak out about it. But I don't. I still care very much about them, hence the need for me to read up about them constantly.

But what's the point of getting angry quietly without carrying my anger over to action?

Perhaps I'm just using my laziness as an excuse; I'm just not bold and not courageous enough to fight for anything. That is why I truly admire people who stand up for our rights. Thank you so much for fighting. You give me hope for the world. I'm not a leader, but definitely a supporter.

About the MDA's latest licensing regime for websites, most of us Singaporeans would just sit back and accept it because...it's Singapore and people just don't think about resisting anything. Ha, I'm guilty of that too. I was all "WTF IS WRONG WITH THE GOVERNMENT" when my sister told me about this but then I quickly accepted it and said "oh well what can we do right, it's Singapore. Then when she said "there are people calling for a retraction of the license so we can still see how it goes", I was all like "aye what's the point, they're still going to implement it anyway."Then she said something that I thought was SO TRUE. She said even if it doesn't work, we still need to show the government that people are unhappy, and not just accepting it without putting on a fight.

And that's why I'm so thankful for people who are bold and courageous enough to stand up against things that are unacceptable. You have no idea how grateful I am to those who are willing to fight for issues like this. They're my heroes.

I don't think I'll be able to handle...

But one day I will. Maybe. Probably. Definitely.

Also, I listened to Imagine today and I felt so sad, because the world's nowhere near that and it'd be perfect if all the imaginations were to realise.

When will these issues not be an issue anymore?

No point

It's always a bad idea to scroll through FaceBook. Then again, I didn't go onto it because I wanted to. It's mostly because of obligations, and then I'll end up scrolling and stumbling upon things I don't intend to see.

Yknow, I only have like 5 friends on FaceBook and I'm already having difficulties tolerating the stupidity on it. Probably were never friends with them in the first place. It's all a lie. It's a two-way thing. You judge me, and at that moment I'm judging you back. But here's the difference, I stop right there, but you go on to force your beliefs on me and infringe on my rights. Fuck you.

Then again, it reminds me to be thankful for some of the incredibly smart and wonderful closer friends I have. Thank you for you.

:))

end of exams end of everything!!!! and yes i deleted some of my posts because i am a woman with lotsa secrets shhhhhh hahahaah

now now i don't really know what to do to celebrate
mainly because it's not much of a difference for me yknow yknow i don't usually study anyway
i probably should clear up all the shit in my room. and my desktop so i can install games like gunbound wheeheeeeheeeeheee someone play with me

and and
my double chin

what about my double chin? nothing i love it

Heart over mind

If anyone wants to treat me to anything, just buy this

I've been eating this almost everyday and I'm still not tired of it.

Here's a picture of my new servant, Hershe Ng, bringing me water.


Anyway, check out the title yo. I've never expected myself to be sucha creature, but it turns out that I am. At least until July. Bon nuit, A BIENTOT

I DON'T WANT TO HAVE FEELINGS

since i've got so many things to do, i shall not do them and shall blog instead yeah thank.

some important things first

• i lost my iphone
• i've got no whatsapp
• but i've got awesome friends, love love

i think i've matured a lot in my thoughts, maybe that's not manifesting but it's okay. i'm still figuring out and still kinda confused about what i want, but at least i am thinking about it and targeting the issue.
i've always believed that change is inevitable and 'change is the only constant' was the only thing i took away from my civics and moral lesson in secondary school. whenever change happens, i would shrug and go 'oh well, life happens', but now i wonder if it's a good thing to anticipate change.

see, i once believed in a 'forever', but of course, life happens and things change, and anyone who wrote a 'let's be friends 4eva!!!!' in an autobiography book back in primary school would know that, so it is practically unrealistic to think of a forever, isn't it?

i raised this issue to my dearest roommate because she told me that she would regard certain friends as forever. and then i was like I DON'T GEDDIT. and then i got it. i used to (or maybe i still do) think that friends come and go, whatever happens would happen, and i'll leave it all up to life. but maybe if i want my friends to last forever, maybe, they would. it's because of that WANT. i guess there would be a difference in the way i treat my friends because of this mindset. (wow i really do have issues, i just used 'you' and 'your' instead of 'i' and 'my' just to detach myself from this hmmmm but at least i'm aware, i guess). if i'm already anticipating the change, then i wouldn't put any effort in to anything because well eventually, these friends are gonna go anyway. i think the effort matters, i think. but i guess i'm afraid of things. yknow, scary things.

i think i've been protecting myself a lot. idk for what and i have no idea why, my expectations are ridiculously low for everything in life. why do things look so much more complicated when i type them all out? my mind is so tangled up.


pOINT IS I DON'T WANT TO HAVE FEELINGS

and that shall be the title. but i love my friends, sigh :(

i'm not the same any more...i'm starting to care but I DON'T WANT TO
life is so conflicting

i'm supposed to be a horse, wild and free

MESS

why do i always write only when i feel like shit?

then when i look back i'll think that my life has been full of shitty things because i rely heavily on writings and pictures for memories

anyway i have a feeling 2013 will be bad hahaha it has been 14 days only and it's already like that oh gawd no

i need to get my life back on track things have been TOO MESSY i really can't cope with going out too often ahhh my home i'll stay with you this semester